5.17.2007

Says who?

I left you lying there by yourself, just lying there. I didn't know what to do, to sit, to stay, to get up, to leave? Your eyes were open and your breath shallow, breathing fast, breathing. I tried to help, but I was rendered useless. I thought I would cry, I really did. But nothing came out, my eyes were dry and there was nothing I could do.

I am not inferior nor superior, I must stop, I must. Sometimes, all the times, never, always? My mind plays tricks on me. It's not true, none of it, do not believe anything. Lies beyond lies, yet I still give in, anyway. Vulnerability and weakness? I think not.

This is how it works. You're young until you're not, you love until you don't, you try until you can't. You laugh until you cry, you cry until you laugh, and everyone must breathe until their dying breath. No, this is how it works. You peer inside yourself, you take the things you like and try to love the things you took. And then you take that love you made and stick it into someone else's heart, pumping someone else's blood, and walking arm in arm you hope it doesn't get harmed. But even if it does, you'll just do it all again.

You are my sweetest downfall, I loved you first.